Doc's Restless Nights

[Doc Kade]

Doc sat on the edge of the bed, his beloved wife in an exhausted sleep beside him. It was another full day of arguing and discussing the future, and another difficult meeting with Aedon that had drained them both. His sleep was shot, just like his nerves, and no matter how tired he was the constant pounding of his head wouldn't allow any real rest. With his elbows on his knees and his shoulders slumped he held his head in his hands.

She's right ya know, they'll kill yer sorry ass the second you hit that jail cell you agreed to.

Maybe, but I ain't see a better way to resolve this...

So you convinced her to walk into that deathtrap with ya? One of the only people in this world who knows you and loves you.

She ain't the one they want dead, this begins and ends with me.

She's right. Yer an idiot, and they're gonna kill ya fer it. You heard 'em, they will find somethin' to pin on ya... some justification to slit yer throat.

Naw I been bein' an idiot fer years. Tryin' to fit somewhere in their li'l chess game, tryin' to force a square peg into a round hole... then fumblin' all over m'self tryin' to clean it up once I trashed it all to hell.

And now yer bendin' a knee to their injustice, their double-dealin', their traps and tricks, meanwhile the one you taught to fight is willin' to go to war when you ain't.

Doc gripped his head in pain, pressing into his eye sockets.

Yeah I taught her how to shoot, built a crossbow that makes use of her magic, trained with her and taught her all the techniques I know...Taught her how to fight, without teachin' her control.

CONTROL? They beat her down over words. They beat her down over the schemes you and Aly put over on Okami, hell they beat her down because they hate you. 

And after the attacks, I ain't do a good enough job of helpin' her manage her anger and fear... I let it take root and grow within her, and now she is as vengeful as they are... And convincin' her to find the peaceful path has grown difficult even fer me. 

And fer all yer talk of peace, they still blame you fer what she has become.

They ain't all wrong about that... I underestimated their hatred fer me, I thought we could still find a place out there... and then when we couldn't... I gave her support instead of guidance. I stood by her side while she tried to tackle shit too big fer us, and pissed of all the wrong people with her reactionary anger. It is my fault.

So what, you just gonna lay yer head on their choppin' block then? Let this be the end of ya? After all the shit you've overcome, this is what ends you. 

And what damn choice do I have!? I ain't gonna turn us into monsters. Could we hunt 'em? Could we kill 'em? Maybe. But then what will we be? What will SHE be?

Like you ain't a murderer.

But she ain't.

His hands trembling, Doc rose to his feet and threw some pants on. He needed to get some things in order. Time may be short.

[Doc Kade]

Another day, another sleepless night. He held Aimee in his arms, her warmth providing him with at least a small amount of comfort. Octavio had come to them today to discuss the murder, and some of it was finally beginning to make sense. A unique blade tainted with dark magic... something binding the D'Amavir family to Yew... the maps Doc retrieved from the scene... There's something here that this murderer wants, and he needs to be caught before he finds it.

I have a question.

Ugh... What now?

How in the blue hell are you gonna do anythin' about anythin' after yer throat's cut?

Aedon is gonna do his best to make my imprisonment safe... I just gotta take my medicine, let 'em have their punishment, and learn from it. Then we can stay in our lane, and they can stay in theirs from now on.

Yeah Aedon's protection worked out real well fer Eban, I'm sure yer gonna be fine. 

Eban made mistakes, went places he shouldn't have with folks he shouldn't have. We ain't gonna play it that way.

Yeah his biggest mistake was thinkin' you wouldn't leave him.

I... I know. I'll regret walkin' away from him until the day I die. He may be a troubled man, but that weren't the way anyone should hafta go.

Speakin' of gittin' dead... You could just kill yerself and save everyone the trouble.

…

I mean... you said it yerself. I reckon there are three options: turn yerself in (which will just lead to you gittin' dead), kill everyone (which you already cried about, and will prolly still kill ya anyhow), or just kill yerself.

I... gave her my word, that I'd never leave her.

You also said you'd strive to do what's best fer her. You know they'll drop all the charges on her once yer dead, yer the asshole they want, not her. You've once again made too many promises and you can't keep 'em all.

And what's she gonna do without me?

Hah! Whatever the hell she wants! I mean she's got that family name, and lucky fer y'all every mistake she's ever made is bein' blamed on you. Sure, she'd be sad fer a time, but she's young! She'll bounce right back. Hell, I bet she'd be relieved about how little trouble she'd hafta deal with before yer worthless corpse was even cold. 

Yer wrong.

Am I though? Hell you shouldn't have even come back to the mainland. Yer folks were already dead, not that they gave a shit about you comin' home anyhow. The first job you land ends up bein' fer a murderous psychopath, then you almost die tryin' to fight to protect the folks of Trinsic? Hah! And now there's a song about you bein' pathetic. Yer a terrible good guy, and a worse bad guy. Everythin' you touch burns.

…

Be a man fer once. The crossbow is right there. Loaded. Put that sumbitch under yer chin and put an end to everyone's misery. It's the right call.


Doc sat in silence, staring at his heavy crossbow leaned against the wall deep into the night. 

[Doc Kade]

It was much more quiet than he expected, laying beside his beloved, letting his eyes rest on the bars that had replaced the door. Of all the strange days Doc had lived, this literally was the strangest of them all. Hours ago he was prepared to walk to his death, and instead now he was fed and warm with the hope of a peaceful night ahead of him. Aedon had been true to his word and then some, and Octavio had offered his support as well in keeping them safe while they served their sentence. In the end, surrendering was the right call, and hopefully with this mess resolved they could get back to the pressing matters they had to suspend. 


You are literally the luckiest sumbitch I ever saw in my life.


I ain't doin' this with you tonight.


Hah! That's rich. You still think you got a choice.


You can fuck right off. I'm done listenin' to yer shit, and we're gonna git right through this and make a real future fer ourselves, not even you can take that away now.


You ain't gonna just git rid of me like that. I'm -you-, remember?



Like hell you are. I ain't been you in a long time, and I ain't in any hurry to go back neither.


Damn straight you ain't been me in a long time. What's funny is that you don't even know what you are now! You spent -how- long tryin' to find yer "new path"? How long did you try to work yerself into a spot you could call home? How long have you hunted and read the "Virtues"? And here you sit, the most hated man in the world in a golden cage. 


Doc looked to the scar on his palm, closing and opening his fist a few times.

No. Yer wrong. I am a husband, I am a friend, I am someone that people fer better or worse look to to guide them. I am a future father, and a skilled hunter. Sure I ain't been perfect, hell I ain't even sayin' I been a good man... But she depends on me, they depend on me. They're my family now, and I'll be damned if I let 'em down again.


It amazes me that they're stupi--


Enough! I have let you run yer mouth long enough. If they believe in me, then I gotta respect them enough to believe in me too. I can be a good man, a good husband, and a good leader. She and I are bound now, our spirits are one and you ain't got any place in our life no more. Take yer hatred and yer doubt and leave us be!


… Godfrey... You can't escape me. I ain't some demon you can force into the abyss, you'll always carry me with you.


I... I know. But that don't mean I gotta listen to you, don't mean I gotta let you destroy me. Yer voice has no power here no more. Just... leave me alone.


He lay there in the quiet darkness, slowly letting his eyes close. He needed to take advantage of his time here, needed to rest and learn and grow.